Seize the day, eh?

Last week, someone told me I have an "artist's soul," and I couldn't help but snicker. I love to perform, but I'd never considered it as a potential career in any regard. So where did he come from, saying I had an "artist's soul"?

Of course, this got me thinking more. I might be more connected to an artist than I thought. I love creating, I love expressing myself. Over the summer, I started playing the piano again. No lessons, no overbearing concern about my posture or length of my fingernails. I just played what I felt like playing and when I felt like playing, which actually became quite often. And now at school, when I feel overwhelmed or lonely or particularly emotional, there's no piano to pour my feelings into. Likewise, there are no plays to disappear into. Because acting, above all other forms of expression, is where I find my release. Comedy or drama, I need a challenge. And right now, with the show that I'm in, I feel unchallenged. It's no one's fault, of course, I think that I just hit a wall. I've taken my character as far as I can go, and it's not as far as I'd like.

I'll be the first to admit that I think I'm an extremely logical person. I have very ambitious career goals that keep me on a timeline for the next few years of my life. But now I'm starting to wonder, did I go to fast? Did I miss out on some of the things I should have by always having my nose in a book? I can't help but fear that I have. I'm young now and that won't always be the case...and an artist wouldn't let these opportunities pass her by.